Congrats PFC Kiri!

Just Kidding! You go, Girl!

Sexy Villainess

Friday Fertography - Orfay Tube Rats

Dawwwg!

from my buddy Nitro

Front Sight Trains Bloggers

How many Gunbloggers can we fit into a Front Sight course?

Full disclosure: Front Sight is offering free gun classes to bloggers who post links for them. My shootin' buddy Jon was already better than me before attending the Gunsite carbine course; this might be my chance to close (some of) the gap! Hopefully, I'll meet some of the other bloggers taking advantage of this wily Public Relations maneuver.

• Front Sight Firearms Training
• Ignatius Piazza - founder of Front Sight
• Ignatius Piazza Blog
• Ignatius Piazza - in Las Vegas Mercury
• Front Sight - in The Mail on Sunday Review
• Ignatius Piazza - in Times Democrat
• Front Sight - on CNN
• Ignatius Piazza - in National Enquirer
• Front Sight - in Icon Magazine
• Ignatius Piazza - in Chicago Tribune
• Ignatius Piazza - in Gun World
• Ignatius Piazza - in San Francisco Chronicle
• Ignatius Piazza - in Fort Worth Star Telegram
• Front Sight - in Financial Times
• Front Sight - on BBC News
• Front Sight - in Gun Web
• Front Sight - in New York Times
• Ignatius Piazza - in Small Arms Review
• Front Sight - in Sierra Times
• Ignatius Piazza - in Forbes Magazine
• Ignatius Piazza - on World Net Daily
• Front Sight - in Guns & Ammo
• Front Sight - on USA Today
• Front Sight - in Santa Cruz Sentinel
• Ignatius Piazza - in Handvapen Guiden
• Ignatius Piazza - in Las Vegas Sun
• Ignatius Piazza - in Las Vegas Life
• Front Sight - in US News & World Report
• Front Sight - in London Times
• Ignatius Piazza - in Washington Post
• Front Sight - in El Pais Seminal
• Front Sight - in Pajaronian Register
• Front Sight - in Black Belt Magazine
• Front Sight - in Cybercast News Service
• Ignatius Piazza - in El Mercurio
• Front Sight - in Los Angeles Times
• Ignatius Piazza - in Playboy
• My Experience at Front Sight
• Ignatius Piazza - on Reform America

Woo-hoo!

I have the Military Channel now!

Sonuvabitch! It's a "FREE Preview!"

Trick or Treat!

This weekend, Terry, the Cactus League Chairman and 4th Sunday Match Poobah, announced that we're going to turn our October Multi-Gun Fun Match into a fer-real USPSA 3-Gun Match! After inquiry on how this is going to happen, I discovered that I am the Stage Design Committee. Yihaw! Hopefully, I can draft Jon into joining.

I've got to crack the USPSA books to ensure compliance, but I think Terry and the Stat Lady are gonna have their hands full with new scoring software and score sheets. Or maybe that's easier than it looks...I've never shot/RO'd a real USPSA 3-Gun event.

My longtime readers and YouTube watchers know that October is traditionally our Halloween-motif match, and Terry wants to keep that. If we're going to include prizes (I hope), maybe we can get a sponsor to pony up something for a Costume Contest too. Nothing that interferes with shooting safety, of course, but some imaginative outfits ought to add to the fun.

Hope he brought ice

In a Perfect World

Notice I showed more concern for the kid's privacy than her so-called "Mommy" Rosie did.

Are you Ready for Freddy?

Hoarked from Rodger.

White Trash Wednesday - Barbie Style

I See Dead Words!

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

* dead (3x)
* corpse (1x)

Bad Doggie!

Bird Bling

Weekend Caption/Photoshop Contest

Sticky until Monday

Got a caption or photoshop for this picture (courtesy of Curmudgeonly & Skeptical)? You could win a coveted Blog Ad on my side bar!

Leave a caption or photo link in comments, or Email a pic to me at the address in my profile. Since ImageShack has been quirky lately, if you're sending a large animation, please provide a hot-linkable URL.

You need not own a blog to win! I'll advertise your favorite charity, web site, or even the P.O.S. Chevy you have for sale!! Judging begins Monday PM.

Winner!

Linda the Skywriter: Iguana love you long time.

Other Contests:
Rodney Dill (1st Place earlier this week!)
Gone Rick Motel (2nd place last week!)









Bagel Blogger(1st Place last week!)
WILLisms
First In!
Bullwinkle Blog
Right Pundits
Texas Fred
S.Y.L.Gunfighter









Photoshops:

After the Practice Match

Boy, was that fun! Lotsa long gun shooters showed up to try my stages. I forgot to bring the camera, so my mind was free of that distraction. You'd think I'd've shot better? No! I sucked big time. Note to self: if your AR is sighted in for 200 yards, hold low at 80! What an idiot I am.

Was not so stupid with riotgun...just slow. I slipped a LimbSaver recoil pad on to the Benelli...it moved my cheek weld back on the stock to where the sights line up more naturally. Also started loading with my left hand (something I never considered until I got a pistol-grip shottie); I need some practice with that.

Jon competed with his POF-USA gas-piston AR for the first time; he's quite tickled with it. Bob brought out his new Glock 34...he's now a shotgun away from having his own 3-Gun battery! Bob managed Jon's Rem870 well enough, missing as often as I did. [Grumble Freaking Texas Star misses! Grumble]

June 3-Gun

These are the Practice Match stages as submitted. Terry will probably improve it somehow.

Pistol - Start Position: Standing behind table, ball in shooting hand cocked behind ear.

On start signal, draw and engage P1 through P13. All steel must fall.

Shotgun - Start Position: Standing behind table, ball in shooting hand cocked behind ear. Loaded shotgun grounded on table.

On start signal, engage P1 through P13. All steel must fall

Pistol: Start Position: Standing in Box A, normal ready.

On start signal, draw and engage T1 through T4. From Box B, engage P1 through P7. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Pistol/Shotgun - Start Position: Standing in Box A, normal ready. Shotgun staged safely on Table B

On start signal, draw and engage T1 through T4. From Box B, safely ground pistol and with shotgun engage P1 through P7. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Pistol - Start position: Standing in Pistol Box, normal ready.

On start signal, engage in any order T1 through T13 from Box A or behind the fault line. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize.

Rifle - Start Position: Standing in Rifle Box, rifle at low ready.

On start signal, engage in any order T1 through T13 from Rifle Box below the stick. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize.

Pistol - Start position: Seated at Table A, hands on table.

On start signal, engage T1 through T6. From Box B, engage T7 through T12. Each paper target requires two hits to neutralize..

Pistol/Rifle - Start position: Seated at Table A, hands on table. Rifle grounded safely on table.

On start signal, draw pistol and engage T1 through T6. Safely ground pistol on table. From Box B, engage T7 through T12 and R1 through R3. Each paper target requires two hits to neutralize..

For those long, boring flights

h/t to Lil Bro

Friday Fertography II - Why you need TWO ferrets!

Here. (Embed changed to link to speed up page loading.)

Jon's Always Been Fast

Here's an old video from 2004. Jon hasn't slowed down much.

(Embed changed to link to speed up page loading.)

Friday Fertography

Gracie and Coco (left), Victoria (right).

Blog Nekkid!

Matt reminded me that today is the 3rd International Blog Nekkid Day! Well, yippy-kayay! Count me in! The a/c's been chugging away all day (it's 107F on the back porch) and I've been avoiding doing laundry all week.

Other nekkid bloggers include:

Miriam
Chuck
Paul
gnightgirl
Don!


Maybe some of the ladies'll post some pics!

Attack Cartoons

Mmmmfidel

Somethin' gunny for ya today....

Get This Straight

Happy Hump Day!

I Wouldn't Park Here

Not Going Anywhere for a While?

Think I'm gonna buy some beer this week

What Lazy Bloggers Do

Found most recently at Blogonomicon:

WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Dad.
DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I print. I like it.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Salami. Lebanon Bologna when I'm back home.
DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Nope.
IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Why not?.
DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Like a hammer.
DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes, and appendix too.
WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? No.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Decades ago...some Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter thing.
DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Except for the geeky velcro ones.
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? No.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Vanilla slathered with Meyers Rum.
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their eyes.
RED OR PINK? Red?
WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? Gettin' pretty lazy lately.
WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Dad.
WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? What pants?
WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Chili Mac & Cheese.
WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Diamondbacks game.
IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Black.
FAVORITE SMELLS? Shampoo in a lady's hair.
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Mom.
FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? NFL Football.
HAIR COLOR[S]? Brown.
EYE COLOR? Brown.
DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope, despite almost getting grounded by the USAF for a lazy eye, I've got 20/20 and 15/20 acuity.
FAVORITE FOOD? Chicken, pizza, Subway.
SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Is this at a massage parlor?
LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Team American World Police.
WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? What shirt?.
SUMMER OR WINTER? Winter in AZ.
HUGS OR KISSES? I need my space.
FAVORITE DESSERT? Whatever Mom has on hand (don't normally eat it).
MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Maybe Lil Sis will post it on her MySpace.
LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Al Gore -- bastard doesn't even read my blog.
WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Re-re-reading Hunt for Red October...I'm that bored.
WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Dell.
WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? A baseball game.
FAVORITE SOUND[S]? Laughter.
ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles...aren't enough dead Stones yet.
WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? In a Marine helicopter within view of the Korean DMZ.
DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Some say I have a sense of humor.
WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Otis AFB Hospital, Bourne MA.

Dispatches (Cont'd again)

Continued from Dispatches (Cont'd)

Jon: Moamar surveyed the battlefield and decided he had damaged the refinery enough to satisfy his Al Qaeda overlords. Besides, there were more Saudi dead than his outnumbered tribesman could loot. Not that that greedy fool Haktoub seem to understand, Moamar noted as he watched him pry the teeth from a Saudi corpse. Apparently his mother never recounted the fable of the monkey and the date jar to him. If it wasn't for that toothless idiot's skill with a rifle, Haktoub would have joined the Martyr's Initial Assault Brigade long ago. Moamar turned to his driver and ordered him to proceed to the fuel pumps so he could top off Lion's Roar's tanks. The chieftain felt he had driven the Saudis back enough that he could safely refuel his vehicles before the Saudi heavy armor units arrived that were surely on the way. Moamar smiled and looked at the head mounted upon the turret of Lion's Roar, anointing it with fresh blood. The Saudi prince would not be happy to see his cousin so "honored." Maybe he would rashly send units into Yemen in order to punish the tribesmen. Moamar certainly hoped so, and turned his thoughts back to the current battle. Yes, it definately was winding down.

Carl: Sgt. Akheeb Assan couragously led his infantry squad to retake the administration offices in the northern complex. Their victory was short-lived, as they were driven back by a hailstorm of large-calibre weapon fire from several BMPs and other vehicles. There was other good news this day, as a sniper reported bringing the enemy's headquarters under fire, and killing at least one person on that team. How much longer could they hold though...???

Jon: Moamar scanned the horizon for approaching Saudi armor as Abdulla the driver broke the lock on the fuel pumps. Abdulla turned to say something to Moamar, but before he could speak, a shot rang out and cut off whatever Abdulla had to say forever. Moamar ducked just in time behind his armored hatch as a tremendous volume of fire erupted from the recently cleared administration buildings across the street. Hakeem, ever ready in the turret immediately opened fire upon the Saudis with BMP's 30mm cannon. The shells, designed to pierce light armor, had no problem dealing with flesh and blood. The remaining Yemeni BRDM-2s that were waiting to refuel also came to the aid of their chieftain, adding their heavy machine guns to the carnage. Some of the Yemeni drivers were so caught up in the firefight that they rammed their BRDM-2s into the walls of the buildings shielding the Saudis. As bullets spanged off Lion's Roar's hull, Moamar came out of his commander's hatch and stood upon the turret, holding the head of the Saudi Prince's cousin high to spur on his men. The ferocious attack drove the Saudis back once again. Trucks and light infantry were no match for armor, heavy machineguns, and cannons. Elsewhere on the fringes, a wretched figure plundered the Saudi dead, furtively watching the progress of the battle.

(Yeah, this one's over.) Graphic repurposed from Jody Harmon.Com

Weekend Caption/Photoshop Contest

Sticky until Monday

Got a caption or photoshop for this AFP picture? You could win a coveted Blog Ad on my side bar!

Leave a caption or photo link in comments, or Email a pic to me at the address in my profile. Since ImageShack has been quirky lately, if you're sending a large animation, please provide a hot-linkable URL.

You need not own a blog to win! I'll advertise your favorite charity, web site, or even your favorite baby picture!! Judging begins Monday PM.

Winner!

Lil Bro's "[whispered] Psst... if the guy to my left ever offers you sushi... just... say... NO!"

ImageShack login is kinda hosed right now, so the current image redirects to Lil Bro's favorite charity, the ARC.

Other Ongoing Contests:

S.Y.L.G. (Second Place last week)
Rodney Dill (Honorable mention this week!)
Bullwinkle Blog
Willisms
Wizbang








Photoshops:

It's About Time

Wheels Up, General Olds

6/15/2007 - U.S. AIR FORCE ACADEMY, Colo. (AFPN) -- Legendary fighter pilot, retired Brig. Gen. Robin Olds, died June 14 from congestive heart failure one month short of his 85th birthday.

General Olds, rated a triple ace for having shot down a total of 16 enemy aircraft during World War II and the Vietnam War, served his country in assignments to England, Germany, Libya, Thailand and the United States, in positions of squadron, base, group and wing commander, and assignments to Headquarters U.S. Air Force and the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

"Triple-ace Robin Olds' legendary leadership and heroic service to the cause of freedom have been an inspiration to our nation and our Air Force," said Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. T. Michael Moseley. "He is one of our 'great captains' and a pioneer of air power.

"He became an ace with 12 aerial victories during World War II, flying P-38 Lightnings and P-51 Mustangs, and later shot down 4 MiGs in Vietnam to bring his total to 16. He also led the 8th Tactical Fighter Wing -- the famed "Wolfpack" -- to a record 24 aerial victories, a total unsurpassed by any other wing during the war in Southeast Asia," the general said.

"Throughout his career, he was a staunch advocate for better fighters, better pilot training and new tactics, culminating in the war-winning air-to-air tactics and doctrine of surgical precision bombing we use today. Brigadier General Olds' courageous life stands as a timeless example of the power of faith and the strength of the human spirit.

"Our thoughts and prayers are with his devoted family as they mourn his loss, a loss we feel as well. America and our Air Force are eternally grateful for his leadership and accomplishments, and will remember him always," General Moseley said.

General Olds was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, on July 14, 1922, the son of Maj. Gen. Robert and Mrs. Eloise Olds. He spent his younger years in Hampton, Va., and attended the United States Military Academy at West Point, where he was an All-American tackle. He graduated in 1943 as a second lieutenant.

Following graduation from pilot training in 1943, General Olds was assigned to the European Theater at the end of World War II, where he flew 107 combat missions. During the Vietnam War, he flew 152 combat missions in the F-4 Phantom as the wing commander of the 8th Tactical Fighter Wing at Ubon Air Base, Thailand.

General Olds' exploits as the creator and mission commander of Operation Bolo, the most successful aerial battle of the Vietnam War, has been documented in the recent History Channel Dogfights Special series "Air Ambush."

He was assigned to the first jet P-80 squadron in 1946; was a member of the first jet Aerial Acrobatic Demonstration Team; won second place in the Thompson Trophy Race, jet division, in Cleveland, in 1946; and participated in the first dawn-to-dusk transcontinental round trip flight. He was a squadron commander of Royal Air Force No.1 Fighter Squadron, Sussex, England, during an exchange tour in 1948.

General Olds' military decorations include the Air Force Cross, Distinguished Service Medal, Silver Star with three oak leaf clusters, Legion of Merit, Distinguished Flying Cross with five oak leaf clusters, Air Medal with 39 oak leaf clusters, British Distinguished Flying Cross, French Croix de Guerre, Vietnam Air Force Distinguished Service Order, Vietnam Air Gallantry Medal with gold wings, and Vietnam Air Service Medal.

After his duty in Vietnam, General Olds was named commandant of cadets at the U.S. Air Force Academy from 1967 to 1971. His last assignment before retiring from the Air Force in 1973 was as director of safety for the Air Force.

Up to a few months prior to his illness he was frequently called upon as guest speaker and lecturer for his inspirational and motivational talks. He was married to Ella Raines, who died in 1988, and then to Morgan Olds.

General Olds is survived by two daughters, Christina Olds of Vail, Colo., and Susan Scott-Risner of North Bend, Wash.; one granddaughter, Jennifer Newman of Santa Monica, Calif., and half-brother, Fred Olds of Virginia. He died peacefully at his home in Steamboat Springs, Colo., in the company of family and friends.

A memorial service will be held at the U.S. Air Force Academy within the next two weeks. In lieu of flowers, contributions can be made to the Red River Valley Fighter Pilots Association toward scholarships for the children or spouses of armed forces aircrew members killed or missing in action.

Don't Ask

Friday Fertography

My Lenny and Squiggy get more out-of-cage time than Paris Hilton does. Heh.

Crypto-Thing 15

Stumped? This one might have been a little too local...but it has a Wikipedia entry.

Update: If Trainer can't solve it....

Miz Emveepee

How 'bout them Spurs?!?

Worth her weight in...weight

Happy Birthday, US Army!

In lieu of flowers....

Dispatches (Cont'd)

Jon: (Lots of machinegun noise here)

Carl: Lieutenant Achmed al Yomamma had lived in the United States for several years. He remembered a college football chant from a game he had seen back in 2005... "Push them back, push them back...wayyyyyyy back!!!!"

Jon: The Yemeni tribesmen too had heard of this saying.

Carl: The armoured vehicle commander feared the enemy's TOWs. But an order was an order. He accelerated over the rise...and went home to Allah and the 77 Virginians...

Jon: At first this raid seemed like great fun, thought Haktoub. The looks on those Saudi security guards just before riddling them with his AK-47 was classic! But his arms were starting to get tired from reloading so much. The clan leader didn't talk about reloading during the morning pep talk just before the raid. And he didn't have very much ammo left either, he thought as he grabbed another magazine from the headless Yemeni tribesman near his feet. "Mustapha's hairy balls!" he muttered under his breath, are all the sweaty fat Saudis pigs in Mecca in those buildings across the street?

Carl: (breaking character) That was funny! You really should consider writing a book Jon! You're a good writer!! ;-) Btw, your TOW teams deserve medals! They are great shooters (unfortunately for me)!

Jon: Though his arms were weary, the thought of collecting gold teeth from the Saudis he had slain drew Haktoub on. The problem was that most of them lay exposed in the street, and these Saudis seemed to be able to shoot, unlike most of the sheep farmers he had previously attacked. As if to prove his point, a burst of machinegun fire blasted stone chips in his face. Angrily, Haktoub pulled the pin on his last hand grenade with his teeth and threw it towards the window where the fire was coming from. He spit out the grenade pin and one of his few remaining teeth as he reached for his trophy knife. By Allah's beard he would claim some of those golden treasures that lay so enticingly near.

[Carl's enjoying Jon's dispatches as much as the game.]

Jon: Haktoub was pleased. That last golden tooth he dug out from the skinny Saudi private seemed to fit quite well into the gap of the tooth he had broken when he pulled the pin from the hand grenade. He laughed at the plight of the foolish southern tribesmen who had joined their raid at the last moment. Those idiots had passed up perfectly good gold teeth in order to look for Snickers bars, the favored western sweets, in the refinery control room. The Saudi special forces there ensured that those southern fools would only find treats in paradise. What status is there in chocolate? Now with teeth, those you can talk about around the campfire. As he moved on, Haktoub stuffed his precious bag of teeth into his robes and grabbed the dead private's pistol. He just might need it to get out of this place.

Carl: The Saudi scout found the remains of his friend. He noticed that several of his friend's teeth were missing. "Barbarians," he thought. "Damn Yemenese vermin! How could they steal from the dead. Now my friend's soul will not rest. If I find any of them, they will die slowly!"

Jon: Off to the north Haktoub heard a Yemenese victory cry ring out. It sounded like someone finally made a break in the Saudi line. Haktoub hurried to gather his share of loot.

Carl: The cheer was short lived, as the high-velocity round vaporized the Yemenese sniper...

Jon: Haktoub arrived just in time to see the clan chief's eldest son martyred. Through the smoke, he spied two Saudi armored vehicles that were providing cover fire to their infantry. Haktoub ran up to the clan chief's BMP-2, Lion's Roar and gave Moamar the news of his son. Moamar gave thanks to Allah for his son's heroic end and commanded Haktoub to lead him to those responsible. Haktoub led Lion's Roar through the smoky battlefield where Moamar showed why he was the clan chief. Lion's Roar became like its namesake and Haktoub watched in awe as it drove the Saudis before it like jackals before the lion.

Jon: While Moamar and his steed Lion's Roar terrorized the Saudi sheep to the north, Haktoub grabbed the fallen martyr's rifle and headed south to flank the enemy. As he rounded the corner, he was surprised to see Saudis pouring out of the buildings across the street. Apparently there were some wolves in this Saudi flock. A couple of Yemeni BRDM-2s also spotted the enemy troops and opened up on them with their heavy 14.5mm machineguns. The large slugs shredded the troops and broke their morale. Haktoub took careful aim with the martyr's rifle and started picking off the Saudi NCOs trying to rally their men. Once a couple of the braver men were shot down by unseen fire, the rest of the Saudis fled back the way they had come. Haktoub reached for another stripper clip of ammunition to load into his weapon and heard another Yemeni victory cry to the north. Maybe there was more loot to be won this day.

To be continued next week....

Dispatches from the Oil Wars

My friend Jon is a big fan of the computer war game Steel Panthers: MBT, so much so that he keeps up Play-By-Email games with at least two other friends (I demurred from playing, since he always crushes me. Maybe some day...).

In the latest game, a low-point Saudi-Yemeni struggle over an oilfield, Jon and Carl have exchanged some entertaining Emails to accompany the saved turns they send to each other. Jon shared some of these with me.

Jon: As instability spreads throughout the Middle East, radical factions in the Yemen military decide to disrupt oil production in Saudi Arabia in order to compound the expanding oil crisis. Saudi intelligence detects a Yemen light armor strike force is heading for the Al Zawya petroleum facility. With only a little time to react, the Saudi High Command orders what little forces they have in the area to react to the threat.

Yemen (me) vs Saudi Arabia (you)

1500 pts 1500 pts 55 visibility/ 15 turn game

Saudi owns all the objectives at the start (positional advantage)
No artillery allowed for either side
No air assests available
Only light armor units (IFV, light tanks, armored cars, SP-ATGM, SP recoilless)
no main battle tanks
5 snipers allowed

** All leg units must be loaded into vehicles at the start because they could not have made it to the battle unless they had a ride! **

Carl: "Don't worry, Mr. President," said King and Prime Minister Abdallah bin Abd al-Aziz Al Saud of the kingdom of Al Mamlakah al Arabiyah as Suudiyah. "We have deployed our rapid reaction force to secure Al Zawya. They have some of the latest American weapons." He was glad that this was solely a Saudi operation, and that his troops flew the green Saudi flag, with the Shahada creed in large white Arabic script (translated as "There is no god but God; Muhammad is the Messenger of God"). He never really liked the stars and stripes.

"We promise to keep oil production at 100%. We know you love your 4x4 Hummer's!"

"That's great! Thanks King Abda....Adballa....oh hell. Mr. Prime Minister!" said Shrub Jr.

Jon: The Yemeni raiders looked out upon the Al Zawya petroleum facility, stark against the shimmering sands It was the wellspring of Saudi power and pride. Soon the Saudi princes would be kings of sand and nothing else, beggars of scraps from proud Bedouin tribesmen. The fiery destruction of this stinking tangle of metal pipes and storage tanks would be the first feast of ash upon their tongues the lapdogs of the Great American Devil, Shrub Jr., would soon taste. Though the steeds had changed, this soon-to-be battle was no different than those from centuries ago. The madness began anew.

Carl: King al-Aziz Al Saud had always been rather uncomfortable with Yemen's experiment with democracy. He remembered back to 1998, when Saudi Arabia had secretly attempted to sabotage this democratic regime through military intimidation as well as aiding internal strife within Yemen. But he never imagined that the raiders would dare attack his country....

Jon: God is Great! Charge!

Carl: The mosque tower bell chimed midnight...and the Saudi troops were already weary....

Jon: Attack! Attack! Attack!

Carl: Defend! Defend! Defend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jon: (Insert vicious sounds of battle here)

Carl: Prince Saud Al-Faisal couldn't believe his good fortune! He was planning on a covert operation by his elite bodyguard force to blow up a Saudi refinery, and blame it on the Yemenese government. And now, Yemen was clearly the aggressor! The Prince knew that his kingdom was running out of oil, and that the only way to maximize profits was by radically increasing the cost of their precisious oil. $150 per barrel soon!! He hoped this small Yemenese raiding party would do a little damage before they died!!!

Jon: Hmmn. These fat Saudi pigs fight harder than we thought they would.

To Be Continued...

Yummmm