I Love Army Men

Not like that, you perv!

Besides making great pellet gun targets...just watch this, a 300kB Flash file.

Saloon Exclusive!

It's not just the Liberals who benefit from Photoshopping!

Pass it Around

Heh.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Ford

Via DaGoddess, I learned that Glenn Ford passed away yesterday.

I didn't know he was a WWII Hero...ya think they would have made a movie! Looking at his filmography, I wonder when he had the time and energy to liberate France (of course, those are release dates).

Punished for Pacing Myself

Had this pic on the desktop for a day or two, trying to pace my content...and Rodger posted it today. Grrr. Scooped. Here it is anyway. Rodger's one of my BlogHeroes...lotsa cool pix and pithy political comment too. I can't match his writing and video talent; if you don't read C&S every day, you're missing out...just make sure you reload the page when you visit. I missed half a week's content until I tried that.

Got Halliburton on the Other Cheek

It's Bush's Fault!

He killed them for the OIIIILLLLL!

This Looks Like Fun

1^st Annual Cactus Combat Match League

Combat Shotgun Classic

When: November 19^th, 2006

Sign up will be at 0730 hours with the Shooters Briefing being at 0800 with the match to follow.

Where: Practical Pistol Bays; Ben Avery Shooting Facility

4044 W. Black Canyon Blvd.

Phoenix, Arizona 85086

(623) 582-8313

http://www.azgfd.gov/outdoor_recreation/ben_avery.shtml

www.cactusmatch.com

Divisions: There will be three divisions: Open (Optic, Comps or Speed loader, ), Semi-Auto, and Pump

Scoring: Scoring will be based on the club’s Thursday Night Scoring System (overall time, minus bonus points and plus penalties).

Rules: Ben Avery is a cold range: so please no loaded firearms except during the stages.

Shotguns will need to be carried in some type of case in between stages and carried action open, on safe, muzzle pointed in a safe direction.

Ammunition: #4 bird shot or higher & Lead slugs, No sabot slugs

Minimum Round Count: 100 bird shot, 10 slugs

Prizes: There will be trophies for the top 6 finishers in each division. There will also be a raffle for all competitors for sponsor prizes.

Entry Fees: $40 entry fee if received before November 1^st, 2006.

$50 entry fee if received after November 1^st or on the day of the match.

Entries are limited so sign up now.

For questions please call Jay 623-910-9530 or email: jbullgpd@yahoo.com

or Terry Allison at 480-946-1971

1^st Annual Cactus Combat Match League

Combat Shotgun Classic

Registration Form

Name:_____________________________________

Address:____________________________________

__________________________________________

__________________________________________

Phone:_____________________________________

Email:_____________________________________

Division: Circle One:

Open Semi-Auto Pump

Amount submitted:____________

Entry Fees: $40 if received prior to November 1^st

$50 after November 1^st

Make checks payable to CCML

Mail To: Cactus Combat Match League

Combat Shotgun Classic

8455 E. Mulberry Street

Scottsdale, Az 85251

A Blurry Valhalla Morning

Wotan (Odin) was a horned one, alright, but his son, "The God of Thunder"
was the horniest. One late morning after an all-night drunken bash, he woke
up and found a beautiful Valkyrie swordmaiden, naked as the dawn, stepping
from his bathroom. He sat up on an elbow and introduced himself "Good
morning, I'm Thor."

She blushed, "You're Thor...I can hardly pith!"

You scored as Freyr. Balder 80% Freyr 80% Njord 80% Tyr 60% Odin 60% Thor 60% Bragi 60% Freya 50% Frigg 40% Loki 40% Sif 40% Heimdall 40% Skadi 40% Hel 20% Which Norse God or Goddess are you most like? created with QuizFarm.com

Least Favorite Marx Brother

on my Least Favorite Harpy.

Hate Posting Old Stuff But....

"France has neither winter, nor summer, nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes."
--Mark Twain

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
--General George S. Patton

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
--Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something abo ut it ."
--Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure."
--Jacques Chirac, President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right."
--Rush Limbaugh

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
--Regis Philbin

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish
than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don't know."
--P.J. O'Rourke (1989)

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."
--John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people."
--Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either."
--Jay Leno

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof ' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."
--David Letterman

"Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
--Ted Nugent

"War without France would be like ... World War II."
--Unknown

"The favorite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says 'First Iraq, then France.'"
--Tom Brokaw

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the Nazis?"
--Dennis Miller

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us."
--Alan Kent

"They've taken their own precautions agains t al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."
--Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot. Dropped once.'"
--Rep. Roy Blunt, MO

"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found truffles in Iraq."
--Dennis Miller

"Raise your right hand if you like the French, ... raise both hands if you are French."
--Unknown

Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII?
A. Table for 100,000 m'sieur?

"Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris? It's not known, it's never been tried."
--Rep. R. Blount, MO

"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII? And that's because it was raining."
--John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv

The AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced after the London bombings that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide. The only two higher levels in France are Surrender and Collaborate. The rise in the alert level was precipitated by a recent fire which destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively disabling their military.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney
(AP), Paris, March 5, 2003
The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris,
caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

Housecleaning

I've resolved to convert my hermit's den into something that wouldn't frighten my Mother should she ever be motivated to visit (ain't holdin' my breath on that one, though). My spare bedroom is a PC Graveyard...I should sell off at least the two oldest desktops and put a guest bed and dresser in there.

I've been living quite miserly on just my AF pension...you'd think in all my spare time, I'd have an immaculate house and yard? If I wasn't a lazy sluggard, maybe. Must. drag. myself. away. from. the. computer.

Got to figure out how to sell stuff on EBay...I'll keep the DVDs I never watch, but I figure someone out there is looking to fill out their LaserDisc collection. And a mountain of CDs I never play. Then I'll take an armful of my gun safe's Bastard Stepchildren to a gun shop to sell them on consignment. It's not like a Firestar or Browning BDM is going to accrue value in another decade.

Don't get the idea that I'm teetering on the edge of poverty...I've just liquefied some of my mutual funds to pay off the truck and the credit card and restore an emergency/discretionary cash fund. Might not have to be a Cheap Charlie again this coming Christmas. And with some free time until college classes next year, I ought to go see the Grand Canyon and Tombstone while I have the chance. Yeah, I'll blog it! That's the ticket!

I'm blogging this to cement my resolve to actually do it.

No, that's not my real couch. Now, replace the cans with once-fired brass....

Caption or Photoshop This!

There's a Blog Ad in it for ya! See ya Monday!

Link to your pic in comments or Email them to cowboyblob--at-yahoo-dot-com.

"The Last Straw"

Five entries? Were all my visitors scared off by my professional-quality (for al-Reuters, anyway) Photoshop?? Was this a bad contest? Are so many of you averse to bunny exploitation? Anyway...

The Winner!

Skywriter:

News at 11 -

"Energizer Bunny arrested -
charged with battery"

Blog Ad remains until the conclusion of the next contest...if there is one.

Geek Alert: This Really Took Place

Broos (Arab Elf, reknowned wizard and stealthy assassin): Sol, my old friend! Welcome to my humble home! What brings you from the frozen North?








Sol (Mighty Norse Battle Mage): I need your help, my old companion. I've joined an Alliance of the Moment with an Honored Enemy, a Frost Giant Hero, to struggle against a renegade Death Cult of Frost Giants who worship a Demon who beheads men, giants, and creatures of all sorts. We must wipe them out!






Broos: By the Tresses of Isis! Have you tried reasoning with them? Find out why they hate you! If you fight them, that only perpetuates the Cycle of Violence!











Sol: Are you the same Broos I know? There is no reasoning with this cult...they only worship Death and Beheading!










Broos: I know, I know...I just had to say that so I could blog this. Ya know, if your name was "Saul," you could be called a Zionist. Not that there's anything wrong with that....

Let's go light 'em up! My friend Phoebe and I just got our wands recharged.

Epi-Tome of Class

That's CB's Saloon!

If you Reeaaaaally want a Hat Tip, fess up in Comments. :)

Casual Cowboy: The Day After

Not holding my breath until the results come out, I offer my afteraction report.

Temps were in the 100s with low humidity; the relaxed dress code maximized comfort. My only hat-tip to cowboy accoutrements was a neckerchief (in woodland camo...heh) which is a very practical accessory when kept wet. The guns were hot in the August sun, but I eschewed the new Nomex to prevent hammer wear on the thumb...I should have dug up an older pair and used them up. I did don the gloves for resetting the Texas Star: hot steel covered with lead smears...no, I don't pull my gloves off with my teeth.

The sixguns (both Modern-class Ruger Blackhawks) ran great! I had mostly A Zones and only one miss on the platerack! Instead of the coachgun, I brought my full-length Eibar 12-gauge to make sure I had the oomph to drop IPSC steel. That worked fine...twice I had to engage a single steel target after a reload and both times I could hear Jon yelling "Give it both barrels!" My need for speed trumped desire for style points: I made the faster single-hull load and finished up.

The Winchester shot high at close range and roughly at POA at 50 yards where the "Roll Yer Own" cardboard was set. The lead semi-wadcutters made big holes, but the rainbow arc of pistol-caliber weapons (even in Magnum loadings) are at a disadvantage at the far targets.

Overall, I had a lot of fun! I was shooting with friends who are used to my funny looks. They all dug the stage designs, though one new chick remarked that they were "written stupid." She backtracked, "Well, maybe I'm reading them stupid." The dirty look I gave her might have had something to do with that. It was an interesting shooting day, but I couldn't help longing for the chance to blaze away with my 1911s, AR or Little Thumper, and riotgun. I don't feel the need to try Casual Cowboy again, although I may continue to write it into stages until all proof of interest peters out. Perhaps I'll try the real Cowboy Action ShootingTM during the winter months...after I lose some more weight and can fit into my costume.

Casual Cowboy/Tactical Tommy Practice Match

Stylin! Wearing my Spaceman Spiff T-Shirt and black shorts, I braved the desert heat and shot the Practice Match in the Casual Cowboy format.

Following are the stages as submitted to the Course of Fire Committee, sans stage diagrams (which I'll post after the Match Sunday). I provide them for your entertainment, education, round-count estimation, and interest. I hope it is equally fun for our regular 3-Gunners as for the cowboy-curious.

Cowboys: note that there is no re-holstering on the clock, nor may you draw from a cross-draw holster. This is accomodate our IPSC-type range officials. If we ever do an all-Cowboy match, we'll try it your way. Newbies, don't run with or ground a cocked firearm. Shoot 'em dry and put 'em down. Grounding an unsafe firearm is a Match DQ. Guns will be loaded, unloaded, holstered (or bagged) off the clock under the supervision of the RO (unless the stage description specifies otherwise).

Stage One: A Chocolate Mess!

Pistol: Start Position: Seated at Table, holding playing cards in both hands, loaded pistol on table facing downrange.

On start signal, draw and engage T1 through T3 and P1 through P6. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Pistol/Shotgun - Start Position: Seated at Table, holding playing cards in both hands, loaded pistol on table facing downrange. Shotgun, loaded but with open action, facing downrange resting on top of guncase on ground as shown.

On start signal, draw and engage T1 through T3 with pistol. Ground safed or empty pistol and engage P1 through P6 with shotgun. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Cowboy Pistol/Shotgun - Start Position: Seated at Table, holding playing cards in both hands, loaded pistol on table facing downrange. Second pistol may be in NonCrossDraw (NCD) holster.

On start signal, draw and engage T1 through T3 with pistol. Ground empty pistol and engage P1 through P6 with pistol and/or shotgun. Ground empty second pistol as necessary. Paper targets require *two* hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

If this were a real Cowboy Match, I'd make the shooter recite the lines from the old M&M commercial: "These cards are marked! They're a Mess! A Chocolate Mess!" This being Casual Cowboy, we know the Dirty Dealer Meant No Harm.

Stage Two: The Cholla Sects

Pistol - Start position: Standing in Box A normal ready, loaded pistol in holster.

On start signal, engage P1 and T1 through T4. From Table B, in any order engage T5 through T7, P2 through P5, and PP1 through PP5. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Pistol/Shotgun - Start Position: Standing in Box A normal ready, loaded pistol in holster. Loaded rifle grounded on Table B.

On start signal, engage P1 and T1 through T4. From Table B, engage T5 through T7. Ground safed or empty pistol on table and with shotgun, engage P2 through P5, and PP1 through PP5. Paper targets require two hits to neutralize, all steel must fall.

Cowboy Pistol/Shotgun - Start position: Standing in Box A normal ready, loaded pistol in NCD holster. Loaded shotgun grounded on Table B. Second pistol may be grounded on table or placed a NCD holster.

On start signal, engage P1 and T1 through T4. From Table B, engage T5 through T7 and any steel targets. Ground pistols as they become empty. With shotgun, engage unfallen steel. Paper targets require one hit to neutralize, all steel must fall.

As the title implies, this stage uses the steel cactus hardcover...I with we had more of thise things.

Stage Three - Sinister Dexter

Pistol - Start position: Standing at Table A with hands on Xs, loaded pistol in holster.

On start signal, in any order, engage T1 and T2 from Table A, T3 through T6 from Box B, and T7 through T11 from Box C. Each target requires two hits to neutralize.

Pistol/Rifle - Start postion: Standing at Table A with hands on Xs, loaded pistol in holster. Rifle on table, mag loaded but with closed bolt on empty chamber.

On start signal, in any order, with pistol engage T1 and T2 from Table A, T3 through T6 from Box B, and T7 through T11 from Box C. Ground safed or empty pistol on table and engage R1 through R9 from Table A. Each target requires two hits to neutralize.

Cowboy Pistol/Rifle - Start postion: Standing at Table A with hands on Xs, loaded pistols in NCD holsters (first pistol grounded on table facing downrange at least 6 inches from shooting hand, second pistol in NCD holster). Rifle on table, mag loaded but with closed bolt on empty chamber, pointed downrange.

On start signal, in any order, with pistol engage T1 and T2 from Table A, T3 through T6 from Box B, and T7 through T11 from Box C. Ground pistols on table as they become empty and with rifle, engage R1 through R9 from Table A. Shooter may make up T-targets with rifle, but only from the appropriate firing position. Each target requires one hit to neutralize.

Stage Four: Roll Yer Own

Pistol - Start position: Standing at Table with hands on hips, unloaded pistol, empty clip/magazine, and loose ammo on table.

On start signal, load clip/magazine, load pistol and engage T1 through T3 from Table. Each target requires two hits to neutralize.

Pistol/Rifle - Start position: Standing at Table with hands on hips, unloaded pistol rifle, empty clips/magazines, and loose ammo on table.

On start signal, load clip/magazine, load pistol and engage T1 through T3 from Table. Ground safed/unloaded pistol on table.
Load clip/magazine, load rifle and engage R1 through R6. Each target requires two hits to neutralize.

Cowboy Pistol/Rifle - Start position: Standing at Table with hands on hips, unloaded pistol, rifle, and loose ammo on table.

On start signal, load pistol and engage T1 through T3 from Table. Ground empty pistol on table, load rifle and engage R1 through R6. Misses on T-targets may be made up with rifle. Each pistol target requires *two* hits to neutralize. Each rifle target requires one hit to neutralize.

Have fun!

I'm guessing they weren't the exploding Rambo-type arrows.

Fixations and Pipes

I guess if Linkin Park can throw together a Heavy Metal Screecher and Rapper, Evanescence can graft a nightclub singer into a rock band. But it just ain't right.

IMHO, Amy Lee is the hottest chick in pop culture today (look at those eyes!), but pardon me while I, Doctor Blob, suit up for Genre Reassignment Surgery. There's no way "pipes" like hers should be wasted in a rock band. It's like eating ice cream while getting a blow job; they're both great by themselves, but constitute a distraction in combination. Or so I imagine.

Here I must make a terrible confession: I like Barry Manilow, Whitney Houston, and *GASP!* Celine Dion. They can musically wail with great gusto...but what works in Vegas isn't hip or lucrative, so great, powerful voices like those of Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, and Mariah Carey get railroaded into singing something catchy and hip-pop. Not so if I were King; I'd match Amy up with a big band and let her pound out some energetic ballads before she screws up her voice smoking crack or whatever rock stars indulge. Step away from the pipe, Whitney!


Mariah, remember "Vision of Love?" Can you do something like that again without calling every dog in Harlem? Thank you. You can blow me now. Right after I'm done with this ice cream.

It's good to be the King.

*Sigh*

Freekin Ice Cream Dispenser

Figured I blogged enough yesterday to do some reading today. What is it with Firefox and Blogger? I'm reading some interesting stuff, then BAM! Reset! I never got this message with older versions. This happens with other sites, but seems most common with Blogspot.

Oh, you want free ice cream from me? Other bloggers take days off. [Whine]

[/Whine]

Oh, all right. Let me top off my drink.




You're still here?

Fixed it

Hey, Ladies!

Blast 'Em Blogger Billy Budd (American Dinosaur, tall guy, center) tipped me off to his BlogShoot tonight with fellow Tucsonans, the Dashing Desert Cat and Darling Daisy Cat. Forty-fives were on the Menu, so I grabbed my single-stacks and braved my social dysfunctionality to meet them at a local indoor range.

Billy and his son were putting his .45 Ruger Vaquero through its paces while Desert Cat was trying out his new Kimber. Daisy Cat was blase' about the beefy ballistic buffet and limited her practice to her Bersa .380.

My primary purpose for this outing was to investigate the problems I'd had with my 10-round McCormick magazines...that and actually meet some real human beings whose blogs I've read. Even after putting 50 rounds of junk drawer .45 through BoG, I was unable to reproduce the stovepiping that plagued me during the Superstition 3-Gun. Only one such malfunction occurred, but never again after I reused that mag several times in both guns. I did, however, get one very scary case rupture that took some brute force to get out of BoG. I'm kinda sure it wasn't the junk drawer stuff...just a bad Wolf round.

Billy and his son gave BoG and Not-BoG a try, just to prove that my scary-accurate hits were in no way due to any marksmanship on my part. Damn, they got some shooters in that family! Billy cautioned his strapping offspring to "slow down," but I think the young man has a future on the field of practical shooting. Speed up! Billy too! Desert Cat declined my offer of boomsticks and bullets...understandable; if I'd just bought a top-of-the-line firearm, I wouldn't chance firing something else that might trigger Buyer's Remorse. But, Dude, if you're just self-conscious about your underdeveloped skills...I'm here for you!

Daisy Cat had many questions about practice and competition opportunities in the area. I could have talked for hours! There's IPSC and IDPA, Tucson Rifle Club and Pima Pistol Club (plus the indoor venues)...what's that? You shoot a 7-round .380? Well...I think she might have a 9-mm in her future. And Desert Cat just bought a tactical shotgun! Can you say future 3-Gunners? Ma'am and Sir, you are living in the center of the Shooting World! Sorry, do I sound excited? Kim DuToit would be dancing naked right now! CB don't dance, unless it's slow....

Now I've got to clean some guns!

For some reason, Blogger insists on posting this picture canted 45 90!! degrees right, even though the pic was taken straight on and never editted beyond a simple cropping.

Oh, yeah...the title. Wednesday night is Ladies Night at the Marksman's Institute. In fact, while we were shaking hands all around, a raven-haired hoplophile roughly my age joined in the ritual...I think she was grooving on me. But I've been wrong about that stuff before. (Now that I think about it, she may have just been grooving on my ultra-cool Coal Creek Armory T-Shirt!)

How SW Episode III Should Have Ended

Ya know, I still haven't watched Episode III. So I won't look. You can, if you dare. At the break.

Warning! NSFW! Contains Spoilers!

Bear Cavalry

Hate the Inbreeding

Coming This Weekend

Casual Cowboy!

Finally gonna wring out the cowboy guns under the casual dress code of the Cactus Combat Match League's 4th Sunday Practice Multi-gun Match. The Match Poobah sent an announcement to the Phoenix-area cowboy clubs and cc'd the League webmaster, who studiously ignored it.

Looks like word-of-mouth is the way to go.

Must not forget camera!